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Whacking Day/Quotes
:Principal Skinner: (after locking Bart, Milhouse and the bullies in the utility room] Would the world judge me harshly if I threw away the key? :Groundskeeper Willie: No, but the PTA would tear you a new arse. :Principal Skinner: Wise council, William. But the potty talk adds nothing. :Groundskeeper Willie: Aye, sir. Skinner leaves You bath-takin', underpants-wearin' lily hugger. ---- :Evil Homer: conga-style I am evil Homer! I am evil Homer! ---- : Kent Brockman: But first, a look at the local holiday that was called distasteful and puerile by a panel of hillbillies, Whacking Day! In a tradition that dates back to founding father Jebediah Springfield, every May 10th local residents gathered to drive snakes into the center of town and whack them to snake heaven. plays After exposing , Honorary Grand Marshal Richard Nixon goes after another deadly hiss. :(Nixon accidentally repeatedly strikes a person holding a snake down for him.) :Nixon: Is Whacking Day over? (Everyone boos at him.) Thank you. Thanks for coming out. ---- :Lisa: How can you people turn on snakes after all they've done for you? :Grampa: I'm an old man, I hate everything but Matlock. Ooh, it's on now. ---- :Lisa: If the snakes were in here we could protect them. :Jimbo: Check out what she did say to us. We will protect the snakes whatever we are. :Bart: According to this, snakes hear by sensing vibrations in the ground. :Jimbo: Ohh, would you really with me, man? :Bart: So, if we put our stereo speakers on the ground and play something with a lot of bass, those snakes will be in here like Oprah on a baked ham. :Jimbo: (chuckles) Yeah. ---- :Barney: (whacking invisible snakes) Snakes! Snakes everywhere! :Lenny: You gettin' ready for Whacking Day? :Barney: What's Whacking Day? ---- :Mr. Ronald Banner: Homer Simpson, could you leave Mr. Quimby along for a minute. :Homer: But i didn't-. :Mr. Ronald Banner: Now. :Homer: Why you little! (grabs bart) You helped the snakes escaped. ---- :Ralph Wiggum: What's a battle? :Fat Tony: If we need to protect the children about classroom we can need to get you to the job to wear. :Principal Skinner: Hahahaha, let's go. :cheering :Superintendent Chalmers: Did that boy just say what's a battle? :Principal Skinner: Yes he said What's that rattle, it's about the heating duct. :Superintendent Chalmers': Hmm, it sounded like battle. :Principal Skinner': I've had a cold, so... :Superintendent Chalmers': Oh so you hear r's as b's? ---- :Reverend Lovejoy: (reading from the Bible) And the Lord said, whack ye all the serpents which crawl on their bellies and thy town shall be a beacon unto others. (Long pause) So you see Lisa, even God himself endorses Whacking Day. :Lisa: Lemme see that. :Reverend Lovejoy: (puts the bible behind him) Mmmmmmm, not yet. ---- :Bart: Ladies and gentlemen! Whacking Day is a sham! It was originally conceived in 1922 as an excuse to beat up on the Irish. :Old Irishman: 'Tis true. I took many a lump, but 'twas all in fun. ---- :Michael Beach: People of Springfield, prepare to build a ceremony opera theater at Town Hall, and do not distruct this about that. ---- :Choir: Oh Whacking Day! :Oh Whacking Day! :Our hallowed snake skull-cracking day! :Boy: We’ll break their backs :Gouge out their eyes :Their evil hearts we’ll pulverize! :Choir: Oh Whacking Day! :Oh Whacking Day! :May God bestow His grace on thee. ---- :Homer: Hey, kids, how was school? :Lisa: I learned how many grams are in a pennyweight. :Bart: I got expelled. :Homer: That's my boy! (sips his Duff beer) Mmm... beer. :Jimbo: Allow him to introduce me... (clears throat 2 times) Jimbo Jones. :Homer: Aah! JIMBO JONES IS HERE! ---- :Sea Captain: Yar, i got the picture of Milhouse was riding on no shirt people's back. :Milhouse: Thank you for taking me a picture what i am riding that guys back with no shirt. :Dolph: Absolutely, man. Nice taking a picture who riding that guy. :Milhouse: Dolph who not wearing a shirt Cool, Dolph dude. So we like you for much confronter if you don't wearing your shirt. ---- :Marge: Bart, I'd like you to read this copy of "Johnny Tremaine." It's a book I read as a girl. :Bart: A book!? Pfffft. :Marge: I think you might like this. It's about a boy who goes to war. His hand is deformed in an accident. :Bart: Deformed? :Jimbo: Fool it for thaught. If we do not talk about his hands gets deformed into his doom. How can we do think about Johnny got his hands deformed into his doom. :Bart: Why didn't you say so?! They should call this book "Johnny Deformed"! :Jimbo: Johnny Deformed. Nice work, bitches. ---- :Ned Flanders: Well i was realize that i was wearing an extra large piece of two cross today. I think i can co inside. ---- :Principal Skinner: (to Bart and Jimbo) And you'll be with your friends, Dolph, Milhouse, Kear-. (He realizes that they haven't been released.) Oh dear God! :Bart: (to Jimbo) That's a happy ending. :Fat Tony: I'm afraid we will never ever capture the mountain bikes. :Hamilton: When you finish, Fat Tony. We got to back from the trap. ---- :Nelson: Imagine...a school out there with no bullies. :Jimbo: Science geeks not getting beat up. Kids using their lunch money for food. :Nelson: I can't take it! ---- :Andrea Bocelli and Chorus: (singing german) Welcome to Do What You Festival, And exciting place called Springfield. We trust the mighty stronger man, there was proud to fearful plan. Let's get down to their business for them, let's get down to their promise for them. Jimbo and Bart Becomes Simpsons Family. Jimbo and Bart Becomes Simpsons Family. Category:Season 4 quotes Category:Quotes